What About Now?
by KaylinNeya
Summary: When Edward left in New Moon, he never came back. Bella never took to cliff diving and the Cullens never returned. So what about now? What happened instead? JXB
1. Preface

**Hello all, new fic from me. This was an idea I scribble down a while back, but I couldn't forget it. It hung around until I wrote some more and I quite liked writing it. Carrying it on all depends on what you all think. This is why i'm going to really ask for reviews. I know everyone demands them, but in this case, your ideas and opinioins are greatly appreciated. Be helpful and critical if needed but please no flames. **

**Rating may change. **

**Hope you enjoy. I'll post the first chapter shortly after this and then we'll see what you think. **

**SM**

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**Melisa**

He caught up with me grabbing my wrist and making me stumble to a stop. I couldn't fight anymore; not now. I looked everywhere but his face; refusing to be caught in his gaze and risk saying or doing something I'd regret.

What little light that had made it through the heavy cloud cover and canopy, began to ebb, giving way to the darkness. That moment – the transition from day to night – seemed fitting. The ending of another day the same moment as a part of my life ended.

However brief my time here at college with him – a few short months – I was truly sad it was ending. I wished I could stay longer, but I also knew I didn't possess the strength; the restraint; required to stay.

His smooth hand cupped my chin and turned my face; forcing my eyes to meet his.

My skin blazed at his touch; my heart fluttered at the look in his eyes. His golden, molten eyes were so deep I would have willingly drowned in them without pain or complaint.

What I wouldn't have given for a moment in his shoes; to see how he saw me; to know exactly what he was thinking.

I would have been so easy to pretend, by the way he looked at me now, that he wanted me. I didn't even need it to be real, just as long as he made it look so, I could pretend.

The breeze picked up stirring the leaves and rushing through the pine needles.

His fingertips caressed my jaw line. He ran his thumb along my bottom lip and I closed my eyes, relishing the feeling.

I knew I shouldn't have still been there. The longer I let it go on, the harder it would be when I left; the more excruciating the pain would be when my heart ripped out and stayed here with him.

The hand around my wrist loosened and snaked around my waist, pulling me closer to him. I felt like my skin glowed; light and heat pulsing the same rhythm as my swollen heart.

"Open you eyes, please?" he barely murmured it, I couldn't be sure it wasn't the wind whispering.

A single, glistening droplet of utter bliss spilled over and rolled down my cheek. He caught it before it reached my chin and I dropped my gaze, ashamed from tainting this moment with a tear.

The breeze continued to increase as the last of the light finally died, plunging us quickly into blackness. The wind whispered through his hair, then whipped past my face, caressing it as he'd done, bringing with it his perfect scent.

I inhaled, committing the smell to memory so I could keep it with me forever.

This must have been how Mom had seen it; how it had felt to her, I thought to myself.

The reminder - of who the immortal saviour in front of me was - woke me slightly from the moment. I remembered the photo of him; the look of utter, uncompromised contentment on this angel's face. I still kept the photo underneath my pillow.

It is funny the things you realise when it is too late. Suddenly, your mind decides to do the filing and you find the perfect solutions to problems you hadn't even known existed. You see clearly the better choices to have made; the right direction you should have taken. Those famous words – what if? – are asked and you see the life you could have had; the easier life.

I sighed, knowing I had to leave; needed to get things sorted.

"I need to go. Thank you, for everything. I'm sorry for-"

"Don't," he cut in, his velvet voice intense. He placed a finger on my lips as if by not letting me say the words, they wouldn't be true.

"I need to. Please don't make this harder for me, I don't want to leave as it is," I admitted, trying to step back from his iron grip.

"Then don't do it; don't leave. Don't say goodbye," he insisted, desperation seeming to leak into his voice.

"Edward, you know as well as I do that I can't stay any more. It was…" I stuttered for the right words, "intense, and amazing and an experience I'll never forget. I don't regret meeting you or what happened, I just regret how I made things; I couldn't help it. Please." I struggled away from him and he let me go.

I begged with me eyes, pleading that he let me leave with as little pain as possible. It was going to be hard enough, without him making me believe he could actually want me to stay.

The tears fell more consistently now. Just as they ran away, so too did my will to leave. I was left trying to remember why I was saying goodbye.

I allowed myself the forbidden pleasure of touching him. I stretched up a hand to his face and laid it against his cheek. His eyes closed and he leaned into my hand.

I smiled faintly to myself. It would be so easy to stay and simply love him from a distance. I could manage it; I knew it was wrong, but where would the harm be? It's not like I'd act on it.

"It's dark, we should head back," I said, dropping my hand.

"We still have tonight," he said faintly.

"For what?" I asked hesitantly.

"To convince you to stay. To show you that you need to be here."

He half turned and reached for my hand. We walked back towards the school, our fingers entwined, my will failing with each step. This was going to be excruciating.

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**I know it jumps into it, but the first chapter will be from before all this. Feel free to ask questions after the first chapter but most things will be revealed in due time. **

**Leave a comment please**

**SM**


	2. Chapter 1

**Here's the first chapter. I hope you enjoy.**

SM

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Melisa

"Dad!?" I called as I walked through the front door.

"In the kitchen," was the reply.

I walked into the little, buttercup yellow room and squeezed my way to the fridge. The room – as usual – was full of werewolves. The pack seemed to prefer to congregate in the smallest room they could find. Dad was here indeed, along with Grandpa Billy, Uncle Sam, Uncle Quil, Uncle Embry, Uncle Paul, Uncle Jared and Aunt Emily. Seth, I knew, would be on his way, certainly not one to miss out on the action.

Okay, so Aunt Emily and Grandpa Billy weren't Wolves, and my Uncles weren't actually my real Uncles, but there were as good as.

"Jace will be here soon, he's coming over with Seth," Paul nodded to me and smiled his usual, sly grin where his son and I were concerned. Tragically, everybody had decided that – seen as Jace and I were of the opposite sex, were both wolves (to an extent), were the same age and happened to live within 3 miles of each other – we were the perfect couple.

"So, what's new? We got something interesting to do for once?" I asked, jumping up in the counter with my glass of juice.

"Mel, off the counter, you know that," Dad scolded but I didn't budge.

"There's no where else," I shrugged and looked at Emily.

"We're just discussing what to do with all of you. The pack is so big now, were running out of ideas to keep everyone busy," she admitted.

"Well that's great because I have something to ask." I looked at Dad, hoping he was in a good mood.

"Can I go to college?" I asked before I lost my nerve.

"NO!" was his very quick reply, "Absolutely not, your not leaving the reservation," he added, his tone softening only slightly.

"But you just said, there's too many of us. Going off to college will mean one less person to find a job for. I'm not doing anything productive and I've been accepted into a really great one," I added in a last effort to convince him. Unfortunately I already saw that this argument was one he was going to save for later.

"We'll talk about this later, for now, can we keep to the task in hand?" he turned back to Grandpa.

That was the end of it, it seemed.

Knowing I wasn't going to help the conversation anymore, I made my way to the lounge.

I flumped down on the couch just as I heard Seth and Jace walk through the door. I waited for them to greet the others then for Jace to follow me in here; just as he always did. I stared at the blank wall in front of me, following the line of the crack that ran along the top join between the wall and ceiling.

Jace and I had both had the same upbringing and had been thrown together almost instantly. I may have not been over struck on the enthusiasm everyone had for us, but I still enjoyed his company. He wasn't bad to look at either…

"So, you want to go to college huh?" Jace brought me away from my thoughts as he sat by my side.

"Yep," I nodded, shifting so I could look at him.

"Now, why would you want to leave me to go to college?" he smirked leaning in close.

"Because I have nothing to do here, and I want to live a bit. Don't you want to see what life is like outside of the res?" I questioned.

"Not really. I have everything I need right here," he smiled and his had came up to the side of my face.

His warmth was relaxing and I closed my eyes sighing deeply. I heard him chuckle softly and then I felt his breath down my neck.

"You don't really want to leave," he whispered against my ear and left a soft kiss in the crook of my neck. I relished the feeling. To some people, I was leading him on; all I knew was I enjoyed the attention, and he was willing to give it. If he got the wrong idea, it was his misunderstanding, not mine.

"Jace, not now," Dad said as he entered the room, "We need you two in the kitchen and it would be easier if your minds weren't so clouded with each other," he remarked and turned out of the room again.

"Dad!" I growled at his implication. We'd dated for a few months last year, and ended up really close. The trouble was everyone else. Had everyone on the reservation not made it their business to pry into our lives, maybe we'd still be together. Who knew?

I stood and headed to the kitchen; Jace put a restraining hand on my wrist.

"Wait; can we talk sometime?" he asked, looking serious.

"Sure, sure. Lets see what they want first." I walked away, now my mind only on what he'd want to talk about.

"We want to get your opinions on what we've com up with. Seen as we don't need to keep to the reservation, we've been talking about extending our reach throughout Forks as well. Sam and Emily are going to try and move up there and so are we, Mel. Dad will stay here but Paul, Cam and Jace are going to give it a go too." Dad said, making sure he'd remembered everything.

"What? When did Mom decided she would move up to Forks. You can't decide without asking her first," Jace protested.

"Jace, your mother will go. It's the best option we have for our situation. Please don't argue," Paul said calmly, being able to remain firm at the same time. I certainly wouldn't have argued back.

"But you said you wanted our opinions. My opinion is it is a stupid idea." Jace was being unnaturally awkward and I had a feeling it had something to do with me.

"We asked for your opinions but that doesn't mean we'll listen to them," Paul stood, towering over his 6ft 7 inch son.

"Okay, things are a little heated right now, how about we all go for a long run and cool off?" I tried to dissipate the tense atmosphere but it appeared my idea fell on deaf ears. Where evern wolves were concerned, things undoubtedly got a little heated. All the testosterone swimming in all their heads tended to taint their better judgement and usually it was better to be in another room when they decided to 'sort it out like men'.

A few years a go, I would have been pushed out of the room, out of harms way. Now though, I was either the one instigating the fight, of the one in the middle trying to stop it.

Just after my 15th birthday, I'd gone through the change and became a wolf. Much to everyone's surprise, I took to it well; better then some people had. Jace was quick to follow and we'd be another two additions to the already 50 strong pack.

Whereas Jace simply became a very ordinary wolf; testosterone fueled, instinctive and unpredictable; I had become a bit of a puzzle.

I was part vampire too; an unfortunate side effect of the attack my mother had had during labour.

XoXoX

Later that evening, as I tucked into my dinner, Jace popped his head through the back door.

"Come on in," Dad called before I had chance to speak.

"Are you nearly done? Did you want to go for a walk?" he asked sitting across from me.

"Nearly. We gonna have that chat?" I asked, spearing the last of my salad and popping it in my mouth.

"Yeah," he said dropping his eyes and cupping the back of his neck.

"You're scaring me now. Is it really that bad?" I joked, clearing my dishes away, but he stayed quiet.

We walked out through the trees; the sun just dropping behind the edge of the earth. We reached the clearing the two of us claimed as ours and he stopped me, standing in front of me.

"Please just take this seriously, okay?" he began, his hands on my shoulders.

"You know I love you; I always have and always will." I went to stop him before he said anything else but he cut me off, "Just hear me out, will you?" he looked deeply into my eyes for a few silent moments. He then dropped his eyes, and his hands, and knelt in front of me. My heart nearly stopped from shock.

"I don't want you to feel forced into this because of our rather enthusiastic families, but I really, truthfully would love you until the day I died. Would you do me the honour of becoming my wife?" he asked, looking up to gauge my reaction.

Shock was the first and strongest emotion. I was so surprised he'd considered this I wasn't even the least bit prepared. The next was worry; how was I going to tell him no?

"Jace, I -"

"That's bad. If you were going to say yes you would have, instead of going to say something else,"

_Damnit, he knew me too well!_

"Jace, you know I love you too, but I'm only just 18," I sighed, trying to explain.

"So am I," he nodded and stood now in front of me.

"Yes, but I don't want to get married at 18. Jace, you're the only guy I've ever kissed; the only guy I've ever slept with; the only one I've ever loved, I can't just marry you because you're the first guy in front of me." It sounded harsh I knew that, but it was true.

"But we're perfect together, you know it."

"I may well marry you some day of that is the case, but not now. I don't want to be tied down at 18. If I get to go to college, I want to be able to have some fun, not fret about spending time with you."

"And if you can't go to college? Jake seemed pretty adamant you weren't going," he argued.

"Dad just hasn't seen my side to it yet. It's a good idea and I've been accepted into a really great one in Alaska. It's really hard to get into," I added trying to argue my point.

"Alaska?! Even if he let you go to college there is no way Jake will let you go to Alaska!" he was so sure of himself. It was as if he was no longer arguing for me to marry him, but to prove my future was on the reservation along with everyone else. There was no way I was staying.

"Jace, can we please talk about this another time? I'm tired and I have school work to do for tomorrow as well as a shift tonight."

"So that's a no to my proposal then?" he added sourly.

"Right now, yes," I said and turned towards home. Without another word he grabbed my wrist and spun me round. He pushed me up against the nearest tree and covered my mouth with his.

_Damnit again! Why did he have to remember?!_

I had never been sure if it was just the way Jace was or if it had something to do with being a wolf – the animal instincts in me – but I could never resist when he acted dominant and aggressive. I had been convinced it was simply because, as a female wolf at heart, I would look to the alpha animal; the dominant one. What ever the reasons; I was putty in his hands; and he damn well knew it. I kissed him back, knotting my fingers in his hair and holding his face against mine.

He pressed his body harder against mine and my pelvis nearly cracked; it made me wild. My breathing was ragged and loud and I would have passed out had he not moved lower, kissing my neck, allowing me to gulp down lung-fulls of air. His hands cupped my hips, gripping tightly as he took my lips again and his tongue lavished mine.

The moment was short but intense and as he pulled away with a last kiss, I knew the feeling would linger for days.

"I'll wait, then," he breathed against my ear and turned away, walking towards the house.

Breathing heavily I slumped to the floor. My head spun slightly.

XoXoX

It had been a month since I'd first brought up the subject of college and Dad was still refusing to budge. Apparently, he'd known about Jace's proposal and was none to pleased I had refused. We now had a nice arrangement; every time I bought up the subject of college, Dad would bring up the proposal. We'd argued and shouted and screamed at each other but neither of us were going to get what we wanted.

One thing it seemed was happening was the expansion of the pack territory. Dad had moved me in with Grandpa Charlie and spent some time sorting out the house. He was giving it to Billy seen as it didn't have stairs and it was in better condition.

One evening at dinner – to which Dad, Charlie and me attended – Dad decided to bring up Jace; again.

"Did Mel tell you that Jace proposed to her?" he said innocently enough. I threw him a glare and he smirked.

"Oh, how nice," Charlie looked up at me, "He's a good kid that Jace; Paul's boy ain't he?" he asked, masticating more steak.

"Yeah that's the one. It's a shame she turned him down," Dad added, keeping his eyes down.

"You said no?" Charlie sounded honestly surprised; speaking through a mouthful. I could have killed Jacob right there and then. Why did he have to keep bringing it up? I wasn't going to change my mind no matter who he got to try to make me feel guilty.

"That's right; I said no. I have no intention of marrying Jace so don't even try to lay on the guilt trip. Everyone else on the reservation has tried it and it won't work, so don't bother." I huffed and pushed my plate away; my appetite having vanished.

"You know; you're just as stubborn as your mother was," Charlie began, "Except for she was stubborn about the polar opposite. She rushed into things too quickly and it all ended badly." He explained, matter-of-factly.

I was confused; did he feel things had ended badly with Dad because they'd rushed it? He saw my face and added,

"It was before she met your Dad. There ain't no reason to go off getting married at such a young age; it never does any good." He then grumbled something so inaudible I wasn't sure it was even English.

I look at Dad and saw him push his half-full plate away from him. Even 18 years after the tragedy, Dad could still never talk about Mom.

Obviously, Charlie had mentioned something that made more sense to Dad then it did to me. The trouble was, I didn't know a whole lot about Mom. The things I'd heard had been about after she met Dad and most of the information had been from Sam and Emily; I'd never thought to ask Charlie.

"Well, thanks for dinner Charlie. I'd better get going. Thanks again for putting Mel up until we get the new house," Dad stood, put his plate by the sink, grabbed his coat and left.

I simply sat there in a silence that wasn't broken until Charlie spoke.

"Such a shame he'd never been able to cope with Bella's death," he said as he stood and began clearing away, "I bet he's hardly told you anything about her. You should know these things, she was your Mom. Renee would tell you,"

I was so curious I almost considered phoning Renee to ask about Mom. Instead, I took the chance, and asked Charlie.

"What did you mean about Mom rushing into things too quickly and being stubborn? Did she nearly get married before she met Dad?" I asked as I began washing the dishes.

"Well not quite, but I'm sure it wouldn't have been long. Before she met your Dad, she was with a boy named Edward Cullen," he explained casually.

At the mention of the name 'Cullen', my interest really sparked. I knew quite a lot about the Cullens; the family were vampires that didn't hunt humans. I also knew about the 'parents', and the 5 'children' who were coupled up; with one exception. I had also been told in passing, about the powers that some of them were supposed to have possessed. One thing I was never told was their names. Now, I also found out I hadn't been told about my own mother dating one of them; it hurt. I couldn't quite believe no-one had told me.

"Mom dated a Guy called Edward Cullen?" I asked, just to confirm I'd heard correctly.

"Yes. He'd seemed like a really good young man. Never any trouble from the family and his father – a Doctor – was a true miracle worker. They were a good couple too; he really was a gentleman. He'd always be carful with her and he was always polite and well-mannered. After an accident – not something unusual for your mother – she was in hospital for a little while. Edward never left her side and Renee seemed to think he was in love with her.

"I worried at first that it was all too serious, too soon. Then again, he had always been careful with her, like all he wanted to do was protect her." he stopped as we cleared away the last few bits and migrated to the lounge.

"A couple of weeks after her 18th birthday though, he came round one afternoon and said he was leaving. He said he didn't want her anymore and that he'd decided to move away with his family. They left that day and none of them have been seen since.

"He broke your mother's heart. She wasn't the same person after, but she still got up, got dressed and went to school. I used to think she only did it for my sake, but she was hollow. The trouble was, as soon as she started seeing him, she didn't go out with anyone else. She never saw any other people except Edward and his family. When he left, she didn't have anything to fall back on.

"That was when she met Jacob and he really did heal her. They had fun – even if I didn't like the sort of fun they had – and she got better. He made her whole again. Then when she found out she was pregnant, she really did seem complete. She had everything. So you see, it doesn't pay to rush into a relationship just because it's the first one to cross your path. Your Mom was lucky; she only had Edward before she found the one for her." by this time, he'd turned the TV on and he stared intently at it. I realised the story was over and I now had a lot to think about.

"I think I'll go to bed now," I mumbled and headed up the stairs to Mom's old room.

**Please comment. **


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